another moral hangover. fuck.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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