Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
i out mim tonsoeep
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