Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize