Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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