i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
you win again, gameday.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
