its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
