Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
