Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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