I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize