I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Randomize
