I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
