Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
