Got a toothbrush?
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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