I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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