He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize