So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Randomize
