I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Its about making memories worth repressing
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
