i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Randomize