Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize