I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
