she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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