Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize