is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Randomize
