i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
There's a naked man in my car right now.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
