idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I need help removing her.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
