it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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