No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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