96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
