You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
