That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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