I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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