i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
