her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
