Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Randomize
