You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
