Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Be still, my beating vagina.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
