Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
