went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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