i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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