how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Pooping to opera.
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