New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
