I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
