I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Randomize
