is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
