like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
