Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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