Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
