My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
you traded sex for a burrito?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Randomize
