saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
