He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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